CONTRAFLOW with Bobby McWheeler
Turning the quartz-halogens of truth on the push-bikes that are killing our roads!

“Good writing and good driving are the only two things he manages to avoid in his ramblings. Cyclists beware!”

“A fossil-fuelled tanker of ignorance filled with fear and loathing for the cyclist. Bobby should get a life-time writing ban.”

“Why did CC choose to publish Contraflow? This driver-drivel sets back the case for sustainable transport and justifies selfish road behaviour. Stop now!”

“Totally poisonous. A callous exercise that angers cyclists, drivers and unemployed writers in one go. Give someone else a chance (number attached).”

“Take a leaf from Harold Pinter and try more pauses in your writing. Say around ten years.”

“BMcW does not deserve the oxygen of publicity. He should be smothered in the fumes from his own ‘not-so’ SmartCar”.

Just a few of the varied comments that CityCycling has had about Contraflow. Which just goes to show what a miserable bunch you all are. Of course as a motorist I don’t expect any favours or attention from push-bikes so not unexpected. Now on with some more vital observations for which Contraflow is renowned. Like the amazing new Toyota Prius I’m versatile and quite green, in an expensive, smug and disfunctional kind of way. Unlike the pius Prius though, I’m rarely silent for long and now have to speak out about what’s really going on. (Can anyone tell me, by the way, how having a car with two engines can really be less environmentally damaging than my lean mean SmartCar?).

Before CityCyling I would just have lazily agreed with V Radzynski that ‘most cyclists are idiots’ and by definition deserve any injuries they may receive. (see letters issue 4). Espousing such views works well in the car-ad filed pages of the press but needs to be toned down for the sensitive CityCycling reader. So one thing I have learned is that there are a huge number of idiots on the roads using all sorts of bikes and on occasion cars. Motorbikes are never the problem - I’d love to own a Harley and will forgive them almost anything!

The most dangerous type of cyclist that you are likely to encounter on the road are those that choose folding and stowable push-bikes. The models to watch out for are Brompton, Dahon, and Moultons (especially models such as the APB Land Rover, Bridgestone and other variants).