The story so far. Cycling historian Claude B Dawes has been summoned to meet the mysterious Dr Rudolph Moeller at M7’s underground bike testing facility in the Netherlands after a very important (and dangerous) bike part goes missing. Dawes and M7’s top bike designer, Lucyna Langlijne head for CycleQuest The World’s Largest Bike Fair where the component is believed to be hidden. ‘The Brotherhood’, the secretive organisation behind further unlikely events has branded a famous motoring personality’s bottom at a motor show and now defaced Manet’s famous ‘Dejeuner sur l’Herbe painting by placing two folding bikes beneath the trees. So far the combined forces of the crack Swiss Bike Patrol and Professor Dawes have been powerless to stop them. But who are they, and what will they do next in their relentless drive to promote their warped vision of cycling?

“You know, I’m beginning to doubt that you people at the Swiss Bike Patrol are really the right people for the job. It’s just that we’re getting nowhere fast.” Professor Dawes judgement had not just been made on one single incident. Firstly the brutal dismembering of the M7 low racer and the vicious branding of the ergonomically designed seat with the mark of ‘the Brotherhood’.

Then the very same mark had appeared again, this time etched temporarily onto the bottom of a very well known motoring journalist. Finally came the news that had rocked the art world. The overnight appearance of two folding bicycles parked beneath the tress in Manet’s painting, ‘Dejeuner sur l’herbe’.

During this time they had also failed to find the highly volatile M7 hub - apparently some sort of fusion assist for bicycles that was relying on two fading AAA batteries to keep it stable. Standing before him and ready to address his concerns was the commander of the elite Swiss Bike Patrol, the specialist unit that had been given the job of guarding CycleQuest. Commander Tobler launched into a stout riposte.

“Professor Dawes, please do not doubt the determination of tout la patrouille to hunt down the perpetrator of these crimes and discover the location of the hub before it is too late. You must understand that we are fully equipped and ready to deal with anything.”

Dawes still wasn’t convinced... “Mr Tobler, remember that I am a historian first and a cyclist second. History has taught us that the neutrality of Switzerland has sometimes been a bit less forceful than it would have us believe.”